Low self esteem, and how to get rid of it

So much has been written on self esteem.

It has a lot to do with what I wrote in one of my other hubs: All suffering is misunderstood love”, in which I explained how we suffer and feel pain because we want to live up so much to the expectations of others, and hold on to all kinds of images about ourselves and how we should or should not live, imprinted on us by others. And how we do this, because one of our deepest needs, being social animals, is to feel accepted by our surrounding.

Well, self esteem cannot be seen separated from this mechanism.

And so much is being said about it, because, as a result of tremendous social pressure all over the world, I estimate that almost as good as everybody suffers from this strange virus, we call "low self esteem".

Because what is self esteem? It is the way we value ourselves!

So, what should always at any given time be the answer to the question:
“How do you value yourself?” be?

It should always be at least 100 %.

There is no reason in existence to believe anything less!

Why should we?

Whoever we are, whatever we look like, whatever our character:

We are born perfectly as we are.

If we for example look at flowers or trees, we like these or that better than others. But that is the value we give to them. While it has nothing to do with the intrinsic quality of that what we look at or what we judge.

So many others may like what we dislike and vice versa.

So what is all the problems about “having a low self esteem” about?

I know this myself probably better than anyone else.

For years, I had a “low self esteem”.
It took me years to discover what it was and how the damn thing even was called!

The core of living with a low self esteem is to be found in our desire to feel accepted by others.

I myself needed so much approval of myself, who I was, and what I did, that it was all consuming.

All my energy went into it.

If you ask me where it came from, I can only witness that it must have something to do, with me being so different and unique in relation to what is considered to be “normal”, that my surroundings felt they had to do a very special effort in trying to fit me in, into the “normal”.

Fortunally, human nature supersedes morals, conditionings and habits!

I am also grateful to be born in the West and in this time, since in other periods in time and other countries I would for long be killed for being so different, which we usually call “abnormal”.

Our society has such a strong but completely blind and ignorant desire to make each and every member of it, “fit” in the predetermined concepts which has been developed, that we have a considered as very “normal” tendency to change or remove all that doesn’t fit or is different.

In this we easily forget that all progress of any importance has come from those who dared, whatever the social control and pressure, to be “different”, and to go in their minds “to boldly go where no man has ever been before”.

So living up to that what others imprint on us is one thing...

Believing ourselves that these imprints are ours, and accepting that they are in harmony with our own needs and desires is another thing.

This is source of an inner conflict we sooner or later feel in ourselves.

Fortunally!

Because this inner conflict between all images about ourselves, our lives and who we need to be or not, and our real own and deep desires, is the motor which pushes us on our search for freedom.

The biggest drive of the human species is to free itself,
and to awake to its natural state of be:

LOVE!

Sounds to good and to simple to be true, right?

Not!

It simply is simple!

And it is simply, well... good!

This said, the solution to get rid of what we identify as “having a low self esteem”
is pretty simple now, isn’t it?

Well no!

If we don’t understand what is going on, the danger lurks to go into our “defense mode”: victimization!

When we feel unable to live up to the imprints of others, since our self-worth is dependent on others, we feel worthless. We feel “less”.

“Less”, being “worthless” without any sign of “worth”, one might say! ;-)

So, as a result of our ignorance to what is happening in our lives, we start to complain.
About ourselves. About life. About how cruel others, the world and destiny is.

And since we are so powerful creators, who create everything in our lives, we … get what we create!

Nobody said creation is the privilege of what we call “our conscious”. And it truly isn’t.

In fact, if we are not creating consciously, we fall back on all our programs on the background, our conditioned state.
That what we have learned, been imprinted and accepted as being “true” for us.

That is when we fall into unawareness, and get entangled in cycles of what I call
 “automated creation, and recreation” of all the same things, over and over again.

It looks like we are trapped in the sucking force of a vortex in the stream of life.

And we spin, and we spin, till we get tired of it.

Or till we become so dazed by the spinning effect,
we feel no other option then to start freeing ourselves.

So, I ask the question again:

This all said, the solution to get rid of what we identify as “having a low self esteem” is pretty simple, isn’t it?

Well yes!

We have to go on a journey to liberate ourselves.

So, how do we get rid of it?

For a start, to become aware of what has truly happened to ourselves.

To recognize that we have been “printed on” with all kinds of habits, beliefs and viewpoints that don’t really belong to us.

By seeing this, starting to not allowing these conditionings to be in existence as unchangeable facts that once “were written in stone” for us.

Instead, we start to recognize that all situations and people we meet in all of our life, are lessons.

And old beliefs, old imprints, that no longer suit us, have to be dealt with as “lesson learned for once and for all”.

This act is maybe the greatest gift one can give to him/herself.

Because it is the very act that sets you free!

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Surprise! Surprise!

No liberation from the outside!

No “liberator” that has to come and liberate you.

No “savior” that has to save you, but yourself!

How much some of you may regret this; Sorry!
Christ is not a living person outside yourself who will come to your rescue.

In a way one might call Christ the archetype of your higher self, that wants to liberate itself. And which, in doing so, by liberating it-self, liberates the whole world.

That wonderful reflection of humanity.

So, looked upon this way: YOU ARE CHRIST YOURSELVE IN YOUR OWN WORLD!

AND YOU HAVE TO LIBERATE IT YOURSELF!

Not by developing some sort of a Messiah complex, and go all over the world and preach some gospel, make the blind see, or walk on water.

The liberation of your world, which is also OUR world, happens inside yourself!

You are the one who has to start throw off the masks of all the different roles you think you need to play, to feel accepted.

Oh! And in doing so, be carefull!

Just don't be rude to yourself.

Dont throw away the baby with the bath water!

Investigate thoroughly what still suits you, and what doesn't fit you any longer.

And let your emotions and feelings guide you.

And it is quite simple:

That which feels good, belongs to you.

That which feels bad, has to be let go off.

Don't start fighting anything, you'll only make it stronger.

Just release things... Simply release unnecessary ballast.

In a way, you have to de-ice yourself and your heart!

The question to be asked by people with a low self esteem is this:

Do you belief in destiny?

And the answer to that is a clear: YES!

In a way that I create it as much as possible myself, there, on all those fields in life I am able to.

And soon, when you have taken your own power back, you will discover that there is no field in life, that you are not your own creator of.

So low self esteem is bothering you?

After all this, you should know it is simply a sign you need a shower, to wash away all alien imprints that still sticks on your soul. You just need a shower!

And the freedom that was hidden underneath and which was always yours will uncover itself and surface.

And you will never be the same!

Because you will finally start to be your "self".

And that "self" of yours is the same "self" as mine.

And billions of others!

It is love.

Plain undisturbed, untouched, unharmed love!